We Need to Talk About The Trans Lobby

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It is the epitome of Fake News.

When the opposition of a marginalized community struggles to find merit-worthy criticism for their target, they like to posture them a militiant, politicized group with nefarious intent in an effort to control the narrative of appointing themselves a savior of the group you- or your children- need saving from. It’s a classic form of mass manipulation, to both aggregate support leveraging fear while simultaneous vilifying the community of people they despise. This act is not rooted in altruism or genuine societal concerns, but instead it is a deeply personal agenda to hurt innocent people solely because they disapprove of their existence.

It’s become a popular term in the media to refer to transgender people who speak out in support of their own community as the “Trans Lobby.” That way, it sounds like it’s an organized construct with donor shoveling us money so that we might parade through the countryside and convert weak minded people like conscripts to go out and fight on our behalf.

Ironically, the group that has created the Trans Lobby term are Anti-trans Radical Feminists who do exactly that. They conduct their hate tours and speak on college campus where they pass out propaganda pamphlets that scream from the cover; “Trans Women Are Erasing Lesbians and Coming For Your Children!”

The fanatical and fictional accusations they make is the reality they’re guilty of. It is projection at it’s finest. They use journalists in their corner, who hatred of trans folks they share a common ground with, to help spread the lies that result in many transgender people committing suicide or being brutally attacked. Hate crimes spiked 81% against Transgender residents in the UK, breaking all previous records.

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For being a completely imaginary monster, they make us all seem pretty sinister with their alarmist headlines.

The myth they force-feed the public is carefully crafted, if not altogether impressively delivered in their urgency to eradicate us from society. They hyperfocus on children. Innocent children in any story pushes the right buttons and pulls at our heart strings. When children are imperiled, it is in the nature of most women (and men) to react swiftly to save them from a terrifying fate at the hands of an evil “Trans Lobby.” They’re using children as pawns to damage and publicly persecute an entire community, already vulnerable to disproportionate acts of violence, because we don’t fit into their narrow world view.

When I was little and would misbehave, my mother would tell me that if I didn’t go to bed when told, the Green Monster would com and get me. I can’t help but imagine trembling mothers checking under their six year olds bed for the scary Trans Lobby. The intent to frighten them into subservience by exploiting their naivety and fear of the unknown is the same, and so is the fact that neither exist in real life.

In the era of social media, if you tell a lie repeatedly, it eventually becomes regarded as the truth, even when challenged. The lie, and the subsequent outrage against transgender people that follows, is far more exciting than the truth, one can surmise. Those who attack us can claim it is on behalf of children while affixing a superhero cape around their neck. It’s all about Good Cop, Bad Cop. If they can convince enough of you that we are a threat in bathrooms, in prisons, in schools, as parents and they’re going to save you, they are elevated to good cop… Us transgender people are bad cop by default. Nowadays, even when we challenge such damning claims, it falls on deaf ears. Your anger is their fuel. They must keep you unsettled and thus, proactive in aligning with their intentions to destroy an entire community of good people they simply dislike. Your indifference, or even awareness of the falsities they bandy about does not serve them. This is why they organize under the banners of MumsNet, OneMillionMoms, WomansPlaceUK, Women First, and campaign so aggressively against trans people throughout the United Kingdom. They need you to believe them and, more importantly, lend your voice in concert with their own which always means abusing and harassing trans people online and in person. These groups talk a lot about saving children from the invisible Trans Lobby, but they never pick up the gauntlet to provide charity or vital care for underprivileged or medically neglected kids. It’s all a big pantomime. A show. They created the storyline, cast the villain, and in Frankenstein-like fashion, agitate the public until they pick up their pitchforks and torches to chase us into the hills.

Here’s their two biggest pitches for encouraging others to condemn the “Trns Lobby.”

  1. Lesbians/Women are being erased by Transgender women.

Lesbians and Women can’t be erased. We aren’t removing them from society or taking anything away from them by virtue of simply existing. None of their rights or privileges are threatened as a result of Transwomen. You never hear “Trans men are erasing gays or men” because this is a smear campaign explicitly intended to crucify transgender women. Of the 1.8 percent of trans women, the majority don’t identify as lesbian. Gender and sexuality are unrelated. Being one does not imply being the other. They are two separate human functions in much the same way having a hysterectomy to correct a medical ailment does not make the patient suddenly a lesbian. Her gender remains in tact, her sexuality is still her own.

Transgender women have no desire to erase women or lesbians. They want to move through their own life unafraid of violence. They want to open a newspaper without reading a headline claiming they belong to some malignant lobby mobilizing to hurt children. They want to avoid uncomfortable stares and fit in seamlessly with the rest as they huddle with the rest of the crowd moving briskly in the crosswalk between blocks. They don’t seek attention. They just want their body to match their mental mapping. Thy aren’t concerned about erasing lesbians when they, as the smallest minority, are be systemically erased themselves. Ask yourself, what do transgender women have to gain from erasing women or lesbians? To what ends? Nothing.

2. The Trans Lobby is forcing children into gender reassignment.

Many transgender people have children. It has been proven time and time again that children raised by transgender parents grow up to be happy, healthy normal human beings who are not transgender themselves. If we wanted to force transition innocent children, you’d think we’d start at home. This lie has been carried on by our opposition for years now, and still, not one instance has been brought forth to demonstrate that it has ever happened. But, facts are inconvenient when hate is so much more satisfying and you have a goal you’re committed to in spite of them.

There is not a single transgender person advocating for — and I’ll provide quotes that have been sent to me — “Encouraging young girls to lop off their breasts and boys to castrate themselves!” This is another tactical talking point with no basis in reality. I don’t know a single transgender person who is advocating for children to transition their gender. We are not doctors or surgeons. We are not qualified enough to wield that type of power over someone else’s children. Transitioning is a long arduous process that requires a team of medical experts, intensive evaluations, family counseling, health monitoring and education. However, we do wish that parents would allow their children to develop as they will, without degrading little boys for being effeminate, or little girls for possessing boy-like interests. A boy wanting a doll does not make him transgender. A little girl playing with a matchbox car does not mean she is transgender either. Our hope for children who do not exhibit binary gender characteristics is that they will be loved and supported as they navigate the rough terrain of self awareness and grow into their identity, unimpeded. Every child, every human, deserved the right to be as they are without being challenged or belittled for it. If w stop forcing children into strict gender roles where girls bake cookies and wear pink and boys fix car and get into fights on the playground, maybe they’d find the freedom to discover who they are without being told by their elder who they should be, how they should act, just to meet the approval of those they love. Some parents have adopted this process of parenting. It doesn't mean their child will grow up to be transgender, but they will grow up to be happy and confident in who they are because they had control.

While it is true that more children than ever before are identifying as transgender, it is hugely inappropriate to blame the transgender community. Perhaps, more children are acknowledging their gender earlier than they had in previous generations because they feel safer, more comfortable and are choosing to break out of the binary boxes that we have, historically, put the in. They’re seeing trans people in media, they have trans friends, they have the internet and can see trans people in their age group thriving. They have a peer support that those of us just a generation ago completely lacked. Kids are born to be who they are, stifling that for your own comfort is removing them of their agency. Scolding them for it pushes them into the shadows of shame where they become consumed with self loathing, low self esteem, no self confidence and riddled with resentment. Letting a child be a child without trying to shape them like fresh play-dough until they please you is not in service to that child, it’s for you. And it’s cruel. You’re blackmailing a child with your love.

These are opinions shared by many trans people because we, too, were once young. We, too, once tried to be something we were not to please those we loved and were afraid of losing. Still, we don’t portray ourselves as licensed doctors capable of initiating a child’s medical transition. Ultimately, you’d be hard pressed to find an trans adult who would comment on this specific topic because we don’t. It is not a field we are involved in. We have many other wars to fight, many of them instigated by the aforementioned lies that have pushed us further to the fringes of society. Our safety as adults is paramount.

The hate groups and bias media have one single fear that surpasses all other: There’s going to be more of us. Trans kids who are unafraid to acknowledge their gender status means more trans people in society and that alone terrifies the opposition, thus, they are incentivised to drum up straw-man arguments, rebuke their existence, and blame us older people for this demographic climb, when it has nothing to do with us. We don’t know your child.

What is happening here, you might wonder? We’re a developing species. Trans people have always been here, often oppressed and living in secret out of fear and shame. Kids today thumb their nose at that fear knowing they have access to resources we elder trans people never had. They are cognoscente of their own gender and it’s relationship with their biological sex presentation and they are either curious or resolute in dealing with it as they see fit. Guidance doesn’t come from us transgender folks, that should start at home, with their family.

And we should stop allowing these papers who publish these grotesquely misleading stories with no citations to continue their attacks on transgender people. We have moved past the era where this same ilk of people claimed gay men would make kids gay… it was debunked when we learned it is inherent to their biology and sexuality is on a spectrum. Gender is too, and we should stop trying to drag us back in time with the same arguments levied against a different minority of victims.

Stop treating children like being transgender is the worst possible of all potential outcomes. Loving a child who may or may not be trans is far better than losing a child to suicide because they couldn’t be who you demanded they be just to satisfy your unjustified bigotry.

Written by

Actor, Filmmaker, LGBTQ+ & Women’s Rights Activist All work copyright phaylens@gmail.com https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co

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